News and Commentary from one of Torrance’s leading therapists.
Where do we begin? It seems that right now there are so many different ways people have adapted to the situation we are living in. Often, these adaptations can be seen as either taking the pandemic lightly — or adapting a maximum protection approach. For example, you can talk to people who will tell you that they are unafraid. The next person you speak to may tell you that they are “Double Maskers.”
There have been different restrictions placed on restaurants. Delivery or take out only, outside dining only and limited inside dining. To me, this translates into varying levels of anxiety. I was at a restaurant yesterday where we were given a sheet of paper that was the menu. It was brought to my attention that after we reviewed the menu, made our selections and placed our orders, the food servers disposed of these paper menus to prevent any possible transmission of a virus. This is only one of the practices restaurants follow in order to maintain maximum sanitization. I wonder how you feel about seeing your server come up to the table wearing a mask and gloves. Are you the kind of person that says, “I truly appreciate the steps they’re taking for my safety,” or do you feel like they’re seeing you as a carrier of a deadly virus?
It has been interesting to most people who view professional sporting events, to see billion-dollar stadiums without one person in the thousands of brand-new, never-ever-used seats. I wonder how many games they played with no fan reaction before they realized they could play recorded sounds through the massive sound system, of people cheering or booing or gasping or any number of reactions that some production person would determine as an appropriate response to the play that just occurred. Then they moved to cardboard cutouts of fans placed in empty seats. Some stadiums chose to allow a limited number of fans into the stadium, often placing fan cutouts in the empty seats between the live fans. Concerts are another pleasure that has been shut down. Various attempts to market and distribute “virtual” performances have had a range of success. Much of the excitement of attending a concert, whether it be a rock concert or a Philharmonic concert, is the connection with the other attendees. Often, “people watching” at concerts can provide as much enjoyment as whatever type of performance you are there to see.
A great number of our freedoms have been taken away. Meeting and connecting with family and friends has been significantly restricted. Some of these restrictions have felt personal and hurtful. Although unenforceable, we were warned to not have holiday family gatherings.
So can we shake off the anxiety, depression, fears and anger, and adopt an optimistic viewpoint. Can we see this as an opportunity to be an advocate for sensible and positive change that will bring our lives out of the period of severe restrictions. Is it possible to think that our lives could return to what we called normal? Imagine schools being filled with children and adults and arenas full of people. Imagine restaurants overflowing with excited groups of family and friends anticipating a fulfilling experience of connecting and enjoying anything from a specially prepared meal to our favorite pizza.
I encourage everyone to be open and honest about their beliefs and feelings about the transition to the post-pandemic era. One of my favorite expressions, “to thine own self be true,” is especially important at this time. With this I mean that every individual creates their own personal vision of what this transition needs to be. Each of us has different needs and different levels of feeling safe. Having discussions about this with family members and friends is the beginning of determining what post-pandemic life will be for you, your family and your friends and neighbors.
Please share with me your thoughts and ideas about how you personally feel about this topic. All viewpoints will be welcomed without judgment, with the hopes that we will join together and support each other to the best of our ability, to bring us out of the shadow and back into the sunlight.
